


Natsume's Floria of Friends

by HQ_Wingster



Category: Natsume Yuujinchou | Natsume's Book of Friends
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Comfort No Hurt, Drabble Collection, Gen, Memories, Self-Acceptance, Self-cest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-06 22:14:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11610030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HQ_Wingster/pseuds/HQ_Wingster
Summary: "I will walk the lonely road, in hope to find something there. Something a little more, something that will piece together me."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Some people are expected to be strangers. Forever passing each other, like ships on the seas. But when the ripples collide, people began to notice who they could've been and who they used to be.Aka, what if an older!Natsume went back in time to meet his younger!self, helping to build a childhood that had more laughs than tears.





	1. Wishing Fountain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nautilics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nautilics/gifts).
  * In response to a prompt by [nautilics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nautilics/pseuds/nautilics) in the [selfcestfest](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/selfcestfest) collection. 



> **Prompt:**  
>  Through some youkai mishap, Natsume meets his younger self.
> 
> Age/timeline of either the older or younger Natsume could be played with! Would especially love if older!Natsume tries to disguise himself as an ayakashi to hide his identity.
> 
> Maybe present day Natsume disguises himself as an ayakashi to watch over or give support to kid!Natsume, who has no idea but is suspicious of this weird ayakashi. 
> 
> Maybe present day!Natsume runs into post-canon Natsume.
> 
> Any type of opportunity for Natsume introspection/comforting is welcome!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsume brings flowers to a wishing fountain in town.

When Natsume was a little boy, he remembered journeying out to the local fountain in the middle of town. A furnished spout in the centre, topped with a giant statue of a koi fish. Water sprinkling from its lips, bathing the pool all around it. Shiny coins littered the bottom of the fountain, carrying wishes and trade-secrets. Some plastic coins made their way into the fountain. Little gifts from the town children, who didn’t notice the difference between a monetary coin and a fake one. The thought still counted, but Natsume wanted to do something more.

It was a bit of a secret, but he could see Youkai. Dancing, little Youkai that fluttered above the fountain water. Fluffing their feathers and cleaning their wings before blessing the offerings in the underneath them.

Every day, Natsume saw these fluffy youkai on his way to school. Watching them roost on the koi statue or preening their feathers on the fountain’s edge. To Natsume, it must’ve been sad to never gain an offering in return. So, the little boy wanted to leave his own gift. However, he wasn’t sure what to give. The ones near the woods liked to feast on Human souls, but they were the big and scary kind. The youkai at the wishing fountain were small and gentle. Perhaps, they would enjoy a little sweet, but Natsume didn’t have the money to buy a treat for them. So instead, he picked some flowers on the way to the fountain and laid them to rest at the foot of the fountain.

Stepping back and hiding behind a park bench, watching the fluttering youkai approach the bouquet. Fluffing themselves before pecking at the petals. Rustling in the yummy leaves and tender stems, being as sweet as they could be.

Little Natsume returned to the wishing fountain every day with flowers. Always watching from a distance as the tiny youkai played and decorated themselves in the floral ornaments. One day, when Natsume came to the wishing fountain again with his floral gifts, he saw a big youkai near the wishing fountain. A fat cat on their shoulder with a stubby, little tail that looked like a cotton ball. Little Natsume kept his distance. But when he saw how gentle the big youkai was to the little fluttering ones, the boy soon grew brave enough to stand beside the gentle giant.

Nervous at first, but he gave his flower offering to the big youkai and their companion. Natsume couldn’t see the youkai’s face-- _ it was hidden behind a mask, fractured down the middle-- _ but he heard the ruffle of their blue kimono when they ruffled his hair.

_ “You’re a good person, Takashi.” _


	2. Shadow Tag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsume plays Shadow Tag with others.

When Natsume was a little boy, he made a good friend. While the children at school excluded him from  _ Shadow Tag,  _ the big youkai and his pigcat played the game with Natsume. At first, the boy was hesitant. Unsure of how the other children would react, seeing him laugh and play with nobody around. However, the big youkai promised Natsume that no one would make fun of him. And to prove it, the big youkai sprinkled magic dust over his pigcat. Reciting a phrase that Natsume couldn’t quite catch, but it sounded a lot like:

_ “Nyanko-sensei, I’ll buy you ramen later.” _

The pigcat turned the other way, nose high in the air in a very prideful-manner. However, the big youkai’s words got to him, so Nyanko-sensei played along. Scrambling back and forth, trying to catch little Natsume’s shadow as the boy ran around. Running as fast as he could while Nyanko-sensei struggled to keep up. Meowing that little Natsume needed to slow down so that he could be the  _ chaser  _ instead!

“You’ll have to catch me first!” Little Natsume escaped from his secluded spot and ran towards his classmates. Dodging their shadows while they tried to stomp his. Caught in childish-play, everyone forgot that little Natsume wasn’t allowed to play with them. Seeing him laugh and hearing his fluttering voice made him fit in and soon, Natsume wasn’t  _ just  _ running from Nyanko-sensei. He was running from his classmates. Not in fear because of their hurtful words, but from their stomping feet as they chased his shadow. Eventually, Natsume was caught, so he became the ghost and chased other people’s shadows.

Nyanko-sensei hid up in a tree, meowing that it wasn’t cheating because he wasn’t Human. But even so, the youkai hopped off the tree limb and joined in on the fun after a few seconds. Defending his shadow with his life as an army of children ganged up on him.

While running and playing  _ Shadow Tag  _ was fun, Natsume couldn’t help but notice that the big youkai was left out. As if he wanted to play, but was unsure of how to. It would be hard. No one could see him, and people wouldn’t notice if he stepped on their shadow. Even so, it didn’t mean he couldn’t play too.

“You’re a ghost now.” Little Natsume planted his foot firmly into the big youkai’s shadow.

The big youkai tilted his head, his mask slipping to the side. “No one else can see me, besides you and Nyanko-sensei.”

“It’s okay.” A cheerful grin curved over little Natsume’s lips. “I don’t want you to be left out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cute stories are fun to write, and I can be childish with my writing for once.


	3. Butterfly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsume has always been fond of butterflies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit longer than usual

When Natsume was a little boy, he loved to catch butterflies. In the big box he had in his room, there was a nature book that had illustrations of butterflies and the flowers they liked to sit on. Before Natsume went out into the backyard with a jar, he would always brush up his knowledge. Flip through the pages, running a curious finger over the glossy pictures. But mostly, Natsume opened the nature book because tucked somewhere between the pages, he saw his family.

His mother and father holding each other, wearing matching smiles when the photograph was taken. Scribbled on the back were their names and underneath was Natsume’s name. His signature wasn’t as neat as his parents, and the crooked lines would’ve ruined the antique. But instead, the childish scribble gave the photograph the flair it was missing. That even though Natsume was born yet when the picture was taken, he felt like he was there with his parents. And even though the picture gave little Natsume more aches than he wanted, he always showed his parents the butterflies he caught before releasing them.

His foster family didn’t understand. The parents tried to, but they were more concerned about having insects in the house. Their little daughter, Miyoko, didn’t like it when Natsume brought butterflies into the house. She always snatched the jar away from him and hid it somewhere. She never broke the jar or attempted to release the insects on her own but in Miyoko’s mind, if she could take away the things that she didn’t like, then Natsume wouldn’t bring them anymore.

She usually hid the butterflies in trivial places. Inside plant pots, in the bathtub, behind tables, or under cupboards. And every time, little Natsume would comb through the house. Find the jar of butterflies and carefully bring it into his room. Shut the door behind him so that Miyoko wouldn’t see. And when everything was calm, Natsume would stick his finger into the jar and a little butterfly would climb onto it. Flapping its wings and resting on the stillness of who he was. Then, little Natsume would grab the picture of his parents and show them the new butterfly he caught.

When Natsume was two inches shorter, he longed to hear a voice. Calling out to say,  _ “Good job.”  _ Telling him,  _ “I’m proud of you.”  _ But when Natsume grew a little taller, he didn’t want to hear those voices anymore.

“Make sure you release them, Takashi,” said Mr. Aoi, flipping through the newspaper.

“Insects stay outside,” said Mrs. Aoi, furrowing her eyebrows while setting dinner.

“Mommy and Daddy’s house isn’t a zoo!” shrieked Miyoko, throwing a fit as she banged her spoon against the dining table.

Those were the voices Natsume began to associate with butterflies, but he liked the insects. They were calm, quiet, and nice. He associated butterflies with his parents because in Natsume’s mind, his parents loved butterflies. Because they gave hope and love, so Natsume treasured each one he caught. Releasing them in the early morning, watching them flutter away before anyone said anything.

* * *

 

When Natsume became friends with the big youkai and Nyanko-sensei, he showed them the butterflies that he caught one day. Nyanko-sensei didn’t care much, but he was fascinated with the nature book that little Natsume had pulled out. Pawing out the pages until a photograph slipped out, and little Natsume hid the photo into his jacket. Holding it close to his heart.

“Is that photo special to you?” The big youkai unscrewed the lid off of the butterfly jar and a teeny butterfly flew onto his finger. Resting on it while flapping its spotted wings.

“Very special.” Little Natsume took a peek at the photo, lips curving into a frown when he saw his parents’ smiles. Fingers nearly creasing the photograph before the big youkai touched Natsume’s hand.

“If it’s special, you don’t want to bend it.”

_ “Mister?”  _ Natsume fumbled with the word. He didn’t know the big youkai’s name, and he didn’t want to be rude. “When someone goes away, where do they go?”

The big youkai pondered on that question. Hiding his hands into the sleeve of his blue kimono, lost in thought. If Natsume squinted hard enough, he could almost see a hint of the big youkai’s eyes through the fracture on his mask.

After a few moments, the big youkai finally spoke.

“When someone goes away, they go back home.”

“How do they get there?” Little Natsume watched as the big youkai raised his hand. The butterfly on his finger flew off and escaped through the bedroom window. Flying off into the setting sun, wings illuminated from the light.

_ “They ride on the wings of butterflies.” _

And ever since, whenever Natsume encountered a butterfly, he admired it from afar. Watching the dainty insect soar towards the sun on beating wings. On every butterfly, someone was going home. And if it was Natsume’s time, he hoped that his butterfly would lead him back. To where his parents were already waiting for him.


	4. The Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsume makes a choice and Nyanko-sensei tags along.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features present-day Natsume and why he's going into the past

When Natsume was Human, he was given a choice. He could either live his life, or go back in time to alter his past. Natsume was aware of the consequences for the latter. Every time something changed-- _ no matter how big or how small-- _ it would chip away at his existence until he was no more. His other-self may never meet the Fujiwaras, or Taki and Tanuma, or his classmates, or all the youkai he had befriended ever since he was gifted with the Book of Friends. His other-self may never meet Nyanko-sensei or have to live through the mistreatment from former-classmates and relatives.

His other-self may never learn about his past or about his grandmother, Natsume Reiko.

Natsume knew this, but he took the mask and blue kimono. Handed to him by the youkai of Time,  _ Kouki.  _ He could reject this, say that he changed his mind and wanted to keep his existence. But deep down, Natsume had longed for a change. He used to dream about what his life  _ could’ve  _ been if things were just a little bit different. He used to fantasize about what if everything was the same, but happier than the first time.

“Natsume.”

The Human turned around, meeting the eyes of his bodyguard. Nyanko-sensei perched himself on top of a mossy rock, legs tucked under his squishy body.

“As soon as you put that mask on, there’s no turning back. You will wander in another timeline as a youkai until your existence terminates. Are you prepared for that?”

Nyanko-sensei meant well. If Natsume carried on with this, not even his beloved bodyguard could reverse the consequences. And as such, he and the youkai would remain as strangers in the other timeline. Destined to never meet or to become friends. All the adventures would end, but Natsume brought Kouki’s mask up to his face. Merely hovering it there.

Natsume remembered Shigeru and Touko Fujiwara and of their kindness and love for him. Natsume remembered Tanuma and Taki, the first few people he was able to share his secret with. Natsume remembered Mr. Natori and how the exorcist taught him that this  _ power  _ that they had could be used for good, instead of evil. Natsume remembered Nishimura and Kitamoto. How they taught him how to ride a bike, the fishing adventures during the summer, and how they always brought him along in their antics and fun.

_ These  _ were the people that Natsume hoped that his other-self would meet. And by his own power, Natsume wanted to make that happen. But first, he wanted his other-self to be acquainted with a dear, old friend. And that youkai sat on a mossy rock in front of Natsume as the teen donned on the mask and blue kimono.

“C’mon, Nyanko-sensei. You’ve led me during our first adventure, it’s only wise for you to lead me during our last.”

Nyanko-sensei skipped off the mossy rock. “What about the Book of Friends?”

_ “It’ll be waiting for you, back at home. In exchange, please protect Shigeru and Touko’s smiles for me.” _


	5. Small Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of the small moments between little Natsume, big youkai, and Nyanko-sensei.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When you see an underline, click on it to view a doodle

When Natsume was a little boy, he became friends with a big youkai and a pigcat. Even though he was the only one who could see them, he never wanted them to be lonely.

During meals in the Aoi residence, little Natsume would set out two extra-sets of silverware on the dining table. There wasn’t enough room for two more, so little Natsume would squish his own space to make room. He wasn’t allowed to give food to the big youkai and the pigcat, but they appreciated the sentiment behind the action.

While at school, little Natsume would doodle and scribble over notebooks. Practicing his sketches as he doodled  [ Nyanko-sensei ](https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B7F6oGLRoVtPOXFwX0dSeHBUa1h2RXNrTE5EaUF2bjcxdTNv) , and the pigcat hid among the toys that the other children ignored. The big youkai usually hovered over little Natsume’s shoulders, watching the former draw. Despite the crooked lines and the scribble of the crayons, the pictured turned out really well. The big youkai grabbed a crayon and doodled his own version of Nyanko-sensei, and little Natsume laughed. Nyanko-sensei broke character to scold little Natsume and the big youkai, prompting the teacher to kick the pigcat out of the classroom.

The big youkai and Nyanko-sensei brought little Natsume into  _ their  _ world too. Showing little Natsume that not all youkai was big and scary. Some were nice, friendly, and most were scared of Humans. Much like how little Natsume was scared of them. It took a few visits before the little boy grew comfortable enough to hold a little youkai in his hands. Laughing when the tiny youkai pounced on him, rolling its  _ poofy  _ body over little Natsume.

But every time, during those small adventures, the big youkai always reminded little Natsume to keep his guard up. Because if a Human dropped their guard,  _ for even a moment,  _ a youkai could easily manipulate him to do their bidding. At first, Natsume thought that the big youkai and Nyanko-sensei didn’t want to be his friends anymore. But when he got a little taller and moved away from the Aoi family to live with someone else, he realized what the big youkai meant.

Because one day, little Natsume woke up and he saw the big youkai and Nyanko-sensei again. They traveled from one town to another to be with him, and little Natsume realized how important they were to him.


	6. Hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsume meets someone who's just like him.

When Natsume was a little boy, he found someone who could also see youkai. Just like him! It was a girl, maybe a few years older than him. With chestnut hair, a shade of reddish orange whenever little Natsume got a bit closer to see. A smile brighter than a flower and a voice that reminded little Natsume of honeysuckle flowers and butterflies.

He met the girl by chance, on his way home from school. She was just sitting on a park bench when Natsume passed by her. They didn’t talk or acknowledge each other but when the big youkai popped in to walk little Natsume home, the little girl pointed at the big youkai. Demanding to know where he came from, and little Natsume had his interest piqued.

He found another that was just like him, someone that could see youkai. But being as shy as he was, little Natsume couldn’t say anything back. Simply turning his head and running towards his relatives’ house. As quickly as he could, and the big youkai followed. Meeting the little girl’s eyes for just a moment before disappearing down the road.

After that incident, Natsume began to see the girl more. Sometimes, she waited near the gates of his primary school. Sometimes, the little girl had a crown of flowers or a sweet treat. Natsume couldn’t take anything from a stranger, so the little girl introduced herself.

_“Kushina.”_

“Natsume.”

They weren’t strangers anymore, so little Natsume accepted Kushina’s small gifts. But most of the time, they talked. Talked about the strange power that they had, relaying stories of how a lot of people didn’t understand them. And if the situation was right, people would come to understand how powerful they truly were. The whole power-concept went over Natsume’s head, and he questioned Kushina about it. The cheerful girl simply smiled, a jagged fang protruding from her lips.

_“You don’t have to worry about it.”_

* * *

 

When Natsume was a little boy, he found someone who could also see youkai. Or at least, he _thought_ she did. One night after dinner, little Natsume retreated to his room and hugged Nyanko-sensei. The pigcat batted his paws, demanding a reason for this treachery. Little Natsume didn’t have one. Simply replying back that he felt a bit weird inside. As if a part of him was gone.

Nyanko-sensei wiggled out from Natsume’s arms. “Makes sense _since_ you accepted a gift from a fox spirit.”

“Fox spirit?” Natsume tilted his head.

“The little girl you’re always hanging around with.”

 _“Kushina_ isn’t a fox spirit.”

Nyanko-sensei rolled his eyes, muttering something that sounded a lot like: _“Children will believe what they want.”_ Sprawled over little Natsume’s futon, Nyanko-sensei grabbed the youth’s pillow. Flailing the thing into the air with his legs. Probably a pigcat-thing. LIttle Natsume raised an eyebrow before getting his pillow back, asking Nyanko-sensei to explain himself.

As a youkai, Nyanko-sensei didn’t have to say anything.

_“But aren’t you curious as to where the big youkai is?”_

Natsume flinched. “He isn’t going to hurt Kushina, right?”

“Didn’t you tell me that she _wasn’t_ a fox spirit?”

The argument died in Natsume’s throat. “What’s so bad about her?”

Nyanko-sensei refused to meet little Natsume’s gaze.

“When a fox spirit is young, they can’t maintain a Human-form for long. Eventually, they start relying on the spirits of the living.” Nyanko-sensei hopped over and held little Natsume’s hand between his paws.

“Why didn’t somebody tell me about this sooner?”

 _“Oh, and a child is going to believe that someone they trust is secretly something else,”_ Nyanko-sensei snapped. Realizing his tone, the pigcat softened his voice. However, he puffed his fur out and pouted in a corner. “If there’s one thing about Humans that I don’t like, it’s that they stubbornly refuse to believe in the truth. _Especially_ if it has something to do with them.”

“Have you met somebody like that?”

Nyanko-sensei didn’t say anything. For the remainder of the night, little Natsume tucked his knees against his chest and waited for the big youkai to return. Hoping that Kushina was okay, but it was only natural for him to feel hurt. Hurt that he was lied to, hurt to know that he was used, and hurt that he was simply viewed as _livestock_ to the fox spirit. Little Natsume never saw a tail from Kushina, but he saw her fang and the reddish tint in her hair. He should’ve realized that something was different, but he didn’t.

About an hour later, the big youkai came back. A small flask in his hands, and he told little Natsume to drink from it. Because swirling inside was a fragment of his spirit.

“What happened to--?”

“She apologized for tricking you,” the big youkai said. He sat down and loosened his mask. For the first time, Natsume saw how _fragile_ the big youkai was. His blue kimono looked fainter and the fracture down the middle of the mask grew. Almost as if the big youkai had to do a big favor to dodge little Natsume away from a bullet.


End file.
